When I first thought about doing a long series, such as Super Moms, I never imagined I would get much interest. I thought no one would want to be interviewed by me, about their motherhood career. ( Remember, it’s not easy) Little did I know that a little over 6 months in, I would be overwhelmed by the response. Today’s Super Mom is Jennifer. She is here to talk about the importance of one’s mental health. Without further ado, I give you Super Mom & Motherhood
Let’s introduce you. Who are you and what do you do for a living?
Hey! I’m Jennifer. This week, I am a Law Librarian working on a side hustle coaching moms through crises and transitions. Next week, my full-time job is as a self-employed life coach for moms!
How many babies do you have?
I have a 7-year-old daughter named Star. After two miscarriages, we got pregnant with our daughter. We had planned a home birth, but my water broke too early for a safe home birth. My husband and I walked to the hospital (only a block away!), and I had to have an emergency c-section because my water had already broken and the baby was by then facing the wrong way. She was born a preemie and stayed in the hospital for 9 days. That was an eventful time, but since then, things have been pretty smooth sailing. She is an amazing kid and I’m proud to be her mom.
Have you always wanted to be a mom?
Yes, definitely. In my mind, I wanted 2 or 3 kids, but by the time we had our daughter, I was 3 days away from being 39, and we decided that it didn’t make sense for our family to try again. Now, we are quite happy with the one child that we have and we couldn’t see it any other way.
Ok, now tell me, what is your biggest struggle when it comes to motherhood?
I don’t want to give the best of myself to my work and then have no capacity leftover at the end of the day for quality time with my daughter and husband.
I know some moms have a daily routine to help keep them on top. What is your typical day?
Every day is different! I always try to walk my daughter to the bus in the morning and pick her up from her after-school program in the late afternoon. I generally get dinner ready at some point (except on Thursdays when it is my husband’s job to make dinner!) Other than those constants, I try to make time for exercise (I teach one spin class each week and on the other days, I generally do a combination of pilates, walking and slow jogging) and then do a lot of work. Right now, I’m working on building up my practice and letting people know about the work that I do. I also volunteer on the Crisis Text Line for about 4 hours each week. There, I help people dealing with any kind of crisis from suicide to relationship issues to depression and anxiety. There is so much sadness in the world, but I’m so grateful that I’m part of this organization that is trying to make things better one texter at a time.
A crisis text support line? Can you share what made you get involved with that? It sounds amazing!
Volunteering has always been a super important part of my life. When I had my daughter, my volunteering stopped for a few years. Then, there was a time when I kept witnessing people in some sort of crisis situation and I really found my passion helping people in those moments. I knew I could help others while still adjusting to motherhood. Around that same time, I saw a TED talk by the founder of the Crisis Text Line, and I knew that I wanted to apply to be a volunteer with them so that I could continue to help people in crisis. You can sign up to be a volunteer today at https://www.crisistextline.org/!
How do you decompress after a long day? What is your ME time?
Crafting! When our daughter is in bed, if I don’t have anything begging for my attention on my laptop, then I’ll head over to my sewing table. It might only be 5 minutes in a night, but I love that time. It’s my time to look at colors and feel fabrics and use my brain in a different way. And, I end up with some pretty cool stuff! I sew clothes for myself, for our daughter and I make quilts. I have a bunch of other crafts that I’ve done over the years, but those all seem to be on the back burner right now. Self-care is really important to me and I try to sprinkle bits of it throughout the day. Sewing is generally my evening relaxation activity, but during the day, I try to make time for exercise and a quick meditation.
Ahh, a lady after my own heart! I also love to craft. Let’s get a little more serious. When plans go awry and not the way you had planned, how do you react? Motherhood has a way of showing us who is the boss.
I’m super adaptable. Things change and we have to change along with it. I come from an entrepreneurial family and my parents modeled for me the necessity of being adaptable.
Do you have a favorite quote?
Each minute lasts the same amount of time.
If you could trade places for the day (alive or not) who would it be and why?
I would love to understand my family’s history better by stepping into the shoes of my great grandmother (my mom’s mom’s mom) and see what life looked like in Eastern Europe for them and why they decided to leave and what the process of leaving looked like.
What is the very best advice you have ever been on the receiving end of?
I recently finished the book called Loving What Is, by Byron Katie, and her words are resonating strongly in my head. Here’s my summary of one of her premises; you can’t argue with reality, and if you try, you will lose 100% of the time.
And because I can not ask for the best without the worst, what is the worst advice you have ever been given?
When I first had my daughter, I went grocery shopping. I was carrying my daughter and pushing a shopping cart. A stranger stopped me in the store and asked if I was breastfeeding. I, looking for companionship and feeling quite vulnerable, honestly answered that we were working on breastfeeding but it was hard. She gave my big postpartum boobs a long stare and said, “Well, it doesn’t look like production is the problem.”
OMG! How rude! As of today, what is your greatest accomplishment? And family is way too easy.
Other than family, I would say that my greatest accomplishment is being willing to try new things and possibly fail.
If you were to win the lottery, what is the one frivolous item that you would have no shame in buying that is not motherhood related?
Do you have any words of wisdom for my friends?
You are the expert on yourself. Don’t let anyone else tell you what your truth should be.
Is there anything else you would like other bad ass super moms to know about their position in motherhood?
You are amazing. You are the right match for your children. Take care of yourself. You are worth it.
I have had so much fun getting to know Jennifer through email. She is a kindred soul and I think we would be friends if she lived near me. The fact that she volunteers her time to help other’s in times of need is what makes her a Super mom.
Jennifer Pesetsky is the mom force behind www.coaching4moms.com Her passion is helping moms through times of crisis and transition. Want Jennifer’s free 3 day guided meditation mini course? Give her your best email address here and she’ll send it off to you ASAP.
Do you know a mom who rocks motherhood and should be recognized for her super powers? This is your formal invitation to participate in something that shows the real side of motherhood and gets your story told. Because we all have a story to tell. Are you ready to chat? Hit the contact us button and strike up the next super mom post!
Until next time
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