There are so many rules in life, why on earth would I want to add more? It goes without saying that there are some simple rules of relationships that we ought to be following, but sadly are not.
I do know this, you will never be loved or cherished the same as you love and cherish.
Sometimes our efforts in relationships go unnoticed and that kind of sucks. The worst thing about not having it returned is the amount of time you invest into something only to watch it crumble. I have sat back and watched all kinds of relationships fail because insufficient caring.
“The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.”
― Ernest Hemingway,
After you try for so long, you begin to think it’s not going to work, and in the end, most of us just give up. The rules I will layout before you not only apply to romance but every loving relationship you may have. My hope is if you give love you will receive it tenfold back. Maybe some of you are hurting someone and there is still time to fix the problem? Maybe you yourself need a refresher on love etiquette. Whatever the reason is, I am glad that you want to better yourself and those who you love.
“ Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.”
Ten rules for relationships
- You can have more than 1 friend, but only 1 friend will know you the best. It sucks I know, but if you think about it, it’s true. You can have a million friends, but most only share the darkest things with one friend
- Don’t try to make others jealous. We are not in high school. (In the chance that you ARE in fact in high school, listen here: That shit don’t fly in the real world, so just stop now)
- Be selfless. Do not expect all forms of love to be returned every time. Chances are, most of the time it will not be returned or even acknowledged. That’s OK. Sometimes loving without return teaches us humility.
- Return the favor if you are always the taker. It goes a long way to preserving a friendship or relationship by showing that you are present and willing to be an open ear or steady shoulder. Sometimes all we need is to know that someone else is listening.
- Say you are sorry but don’t say it so much it loses its meaning. Sorry has become the new four letter word of apologies. It loses its meaning after the first 100 times. Try to find another way to apologize without saying sorry.
Not Every Rule Is Meant To Be Broken
- Say what you mean. Again, whoever it is this applies to, we are all grown-ups for Pete’s sake! If your feelings are hurt, speak the hell up!!! I have never personally met a mind reader, so it goes without saying that if you want to be heard, you must use your voice.
- A friendship is not a contest. And neither is romance. Don’t compete with others for one person’s attention. If they are truly your friend/love, there will be no contest. Also, important to note, see rule 1
- Know them. I mean really know them. Know the things they hate, and love. Give them hope whatever they are going through, you are there. If they need space that needs to be given too. I know when I am personally feeling down or needy (for lack of a better word) most of the time I do not need someone to fix my problems. I just need to know I am not alone.
- Never speak horrible things and always defend. If you are my best buddy or my love, no matter if you are right or wrong, I will always speak good things and I will always defend you to anyone else. If someone has nasty things to say about you, you should already know that I will be the first to defend you to the fullest, even when you are wrong. To your face, if you too are wrong, I will be the first to try to help you right that.
But the main thing to being in a relationship or friendship that works is this golden rule:
If you still love someone (mushy type or otherwise) you stay by their side, thru thick AND thin. You don’t trade them in for something that sounds better, because when better fails, they may not let you back in.
This is my best friend and biggest cheerleader. We are enjoying time playing in the mud
Below is a poem I found and love. I honestly do not know who wrote it. If you happen to know who the author is, or you wrote this lovely string of words, please contact me. I would love to give credit where credit is due.
Twenty Rules to Being Your Best Friend
When you’re depressed, I’ll scare the crap out of you so you’re too busy calming your heart rate to keep being depressed.
When you trip and fall flat on your face, I’ll point and laugh, and if anyone else dares, I’ll beat them up to a pulp.
When you get a boyfriend you really like, I’ll tease you endlessly about him, and when you’re not looking, I’ll march up to him and warn, “She’s my best friend; you break her heart, I’ll break your face.
When you’re blue, I will try my best to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you’re standing by the water or on the diving board, I’ll push you into the water and laugh at you.
When you say “I hate you!” I’ll respond “I love you too.”
We can never discuss anything serious because whenever we try, we always end up rolling around in laughter.
My dream future always includes you.
When you grin, I know it’s not necessarily because you’re happy, but because you’re plotting something, and it involves me.
When you are trying to avoid somebody, I will invite that somebody to your house, lock you two in your room and demand you make amends or else I’m not unlocking the door.
I will humiliate myself to make you laugh when you’re sad.
When I discover an incredibly scary video on the Internet or whatnot, I will send it to you just to freak you out.
I love you embarrass you.
When we laugh, we laugh together. When we cry, we cry together.
I can see right through you; I can read your mind; I always know how you feel when I’m in your presence.
I will never stop insulting you.
I know more about you than you do yourself.
Whenever you’re planning a prank, no matter how devious it might be, I want to be a part of it as long as you’re sure you want to go through with it.
When we play the Trust game, and you’re falling into my arms, I won’t catch you and I’ll laugh when you topple over onto the ground, but when you fall in real life, I’ll always be there for you.
I will always be there for you, no matter how many times I make fun of you.
Just Follow The Rules, You’ll Be OK
Many of us must learn the hard way through trial and error. Some unfortunate souls will never learn. But if you want to build lasting relationships you have to adhere to these. They don’t have to be verbatim but implementing them to daily life will change the way you interact with people. And at the end of the day, it might make you sleep a bit better. When you have less to worry about, you can continue to live a loving and healthy lifestyle.
Until next time…
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